


A Newborn Fear

by Caiti (Caitriona_3)



Category: Captain America (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, F/M, Internal musings
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-07
Updated: 2021-03-07
Packaged: 2021-03-13 22:22:55
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 543
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29907969
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Caitriona_3/pseuds/Caiti
Summary: Bucky’s internal musing as he watches Steve & Peggy struggle with their fear.
Relationships: James "Bucky" Barnes & Peggy Carter, James "Bucky" Barnes & Peggy Carter & Steve Rogers, James "Bucky" Barnes & Steve Rogers, Peggy Carter/Steve Rogers
Comments: 9
Kudos: 28
Collections: Bad Things Happen Bingo, Marvel Fluff Bingo, Steggy Bingo Bash





	A Newborn Fear

**Author's Note:**

> Two mood boards and a short bit of Bucky's internal thoughts.
> 
> Bingos:
> 
> Steggy Bingo - O1 - Begging  
> Marvel Fluff Bingo - O1 - Hurt/Comfort  
> Avengers Bingo - 2/1 - Bed Sharing  
> Bad Things Happen Bingo - I1 - Bedside Vigil

[](https://imgur.com/K4jwd3e)

[ ](https://imgur.com/uUJ4z0A)

_"Sometimes being a friend means mastering the art of timing._   
_There is a time for silence._  
 _A time to let go and allow people to hurl themselves into their own destiny._   
_And a time to prepare to pick up the pieces when it's all over."_  
 _~ Octavia Butler_

James Buchanan Barnes had been a lot of things – friend and enemy, villain and hero. Somehow he’d managed to travel from punk kid to honored soldier to feared assassin to public hero. Between friends and enemies, he’d earned enough scars, both physical and mental, to bring aches in the cold of a dark night. His hands dripped red with metaphoric blood, but he’d become a shield for those he loved. But he didn’t know what to do now.

How did you shield someone from illness? From the hidden enemy within?

Standing in the hospital hallway, he leaned back against the wall. Arms folded over his chest, one ankle crossed over the other, he kept his chin lowered to prevent people from trying to talk to him, but his eyes remained steady and focused on the door in front of him.

Through the small crack, he could see Steve and Peggy sitting beside the small bed. The bed that held a tiny figure being carefully monitored. The doctors had called it the ‘As and Bs’ – apnea and bradycardia. Bucky didn’t care what they called it – it all meant one thing. Little Rebecca Rogers had come into the world a little too early and now faced a fight to stay with them.

_Just let her have even half of her parents’ bullheadedness._

Was that a prayer? A hope? He didn’t know, but he hoped to God she did.

Although her parents remained hopeful, deliberately optimistic, they’d both hit walls of fear and grief in the past few days. It had been a fight to get them out of the hospital for breaks – as if they feared she would slip away the moment they took their eyes off her. Clint would watch over whoever stayed at the hospital while Bucky all but dragged the other away.

Steve to the gym . . . where he went through one punching bag after another.

Peggy to the gun range . . . where she shredded targets into confetti.

Shower, eat, and then do whatever it took to get them to get a few hours sleep. 

After the first couple of times they’d snuck out on him, Bucky tossed any personal boundaries and just shared the bed. They might be able to slip past him, but they couldn’t slide out of bed without waking him up. Turns out he’d been more needed than he’d realized. Both of them clung to him, crying out their fears and worries on his shoulder as well as taking in the comfort he offered. He’d done his best not to cry as he’d listened to their quiet begging for Rebecca’s health and well-being. Each whisper a soft prayer to a power he only sometimes believed in.

Though if that little girl in there came through, he would take himself to the nearest church in order to give thanks.

He could still remember the moment they asked him to be her godfather . . . 

Throat closing, he bowed his head further and shut his eyes.

_Please._


End file.
